Troubador No Mum, Tomorrow's Not Tuesday

Released: 19/06/2017

eISBN: 9781788030441

Format: eBook

Review this Book

No Mum, Tomorrow's Not Tuesday


Each story has meaning. Every story is important. This is Reg and his mother’s tale of living with dementia.

As his mother’s disease progressed, Reg started to write this book in the form of a diary, partly so that he could keep track of the dementia’s progress but also to keep a record of his mother in those last, desperate years.

The dementia crept up on both of them; for a long time they were in denial. He and his mother shared many conversations, often verging on the surreal. They laughed together; they cried together, they faced dementia as a partnership. He arranged carers, dealt with hospital appointments and doctors, did the shopping and so much more in between.

Reg knew little about the disease when it first started to take hold. He discovered things as time went by that, had he known about them earlier, might have provided his mother with a some comfort. He hopes that this book may provide help to families coping with a relative suffering from dementia.

There are already many books about dementia, and the author recognises this as a good thing. The more we strive for awareness, the greater the chance that future generations will not suffer in a similar fashion.

A fantastic, heart-warming read which gives an insight into the experience of Reg as he cares for his elderly mother who has been diagnosed with dementia. As he says in the opening of the book - "All illnesses affect not just the patient but all those who care for and love that person" and this was something which I didn't really think too much about until reading this short book. Not only was it incredibly honest, but it was clear to see the love which brought himself and his Mum together.
This book is written in a diary format, with various entries between January 2014 and May 2015 which included various visits and examples of conversations and events that took place between those dates. You also learn a bit about his family which is a nice touch because it's interesting to read about the context and situation that Reg is in, whilst taking care of his Mum.
I would definitely recommend this book, whether you know someone with dementia or not because it allows you to gain an insight into the difficult challenges that arise whilst being a carer, which we will all probably be able to relate to some time within our lives, whether this is currently or in the future. I'm so glad that Reg shared his experience because it was a fantastic and loving tribute to his Mum. I'm sure his Mum is very proud of him and appreciates the extent that he devoted his time towards her - a son that many people could only dream of.

I'm also planning on buying Reg's other book, Dear Charlie, about his daughter Charlie who was killed in a train accident in 2005. I'm sure this will be just as heartbreaking as this one but sure makes an equally touching read.

by Marie Andrews

I wanted to read this book because of someone I know that has been diagnosed with the beginning of dementia. It is so very easy to say what we would do in any situation, but I wanted to read this book because the author is speaking from experience. This book was very good. It takes you on the journey with his mom and it is a very honest look at dementia from the caregiver's point of view. What a awesome book. I know all experiences are different but this book will remain with me and I know I will think about passages from this book quite a bit. The author's writing is clear, concise and to the point. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and the publisher for the ARC of this book in return for my honest review. I recommend this book to anyone dealing with someone with this disease. Very enlightening.

by V Nunez

This is a really interesting insight into what it's like to have a relative with dementia, as the author has taken on the majority of the caring for his elderly mother. It's a collection of Reg's diary entries, which makes this book all the more fascinating; the entries were written whilst Reg was in the moment and the things he talks about are raw and honest. Having worked with older adults with dementia, I could see a lot of common themes between all of these people and Reg's mother, but the difference with this book is that is written with the emotional investment that Reg and the rest of his family have.

This may be a useful read if you have a family member with a similar diagnosis, as it may help to reassure you that the repetitive conversations and all of the other nuances that come along with a dementia diagnosis are 'normal' for that person, and that you are not entirely alone in your experiences.

I liked that Reg included his thoughts on the months after his mother's death as well as during her last years, as you could really pick up on his emotions.

by Laura Hainsworth

No Mum, Tomorrow’s Not Tuesday is a sombre read. It’s a non-fiction book written in diary format, by Reg, during the final few years of his Mum’s life while he became her sole carer.

Reg’s account is a no holds barred look at dementia. It’s real, it’s sad and it’s necessary. As someone who has had a personal connection with dementia and has spent a lot of time with dementia patients, I think it’s incredibly important that dementia isn’t seen as simply ‘memory loss.’ Dementia invokes so much fear in both patients and carers, something which Reg writes about frequently as his fears stretch much further than just for himself and his mother.

The book isn’t all doom and gloom though. There are moments of genuine hilarity and warmth from Reg’s mother and their relationships never falters, despite the hardships.

For many, chronicling a parent’s illness would be too much to bear, but there must be thanks given to Reg for sharing his experience. His account is not only a story about him and his mother, but also the effects of dementia on the whole family, and on people who knew the person before they became ill.

Throughout the book, Reg learns more about dementia and we, as readers, learn with him as he finds that many of his mother’s obstinate behaviours are her illness.

No Mum, Tomorrow’s Not Tuesday is a crucial read for anyone dealing with a diagnosis of dementia, whether it be the person themselves, a friend or a relative.

by Rachel Carney

A 4* review for No Mum, Tomorrow's Not Tuesday by Reg Thompson. This is a wonderful heartwarming story Reg and his mother who is living with dementia. Reg decided to write this diary so keep a track of his mother's decline whilst he was her main carer. The story is beautifully told and you can hear the pain and anguish that both Reg and his mother are going through in trying to live with the life altering disease that is Dementia.

As Reg so eloquently puts it at the beginning of the book "All illnesses affect not just the patient but all those who care for and love that person". It shows in detail how Reg's life is falling apart around his ears whilst trying to love and care for his mother who is so scared and confused that she can ring him every 10 minutes asking "Where am i?" "Please take me home, i am scared" which results in him reassuring her over 20 times a day and often racing round to her house to see her.

The book contains a few snippets of humour but some dark times too when she frequently asks him how his daughter is (who died a few years before). He repeatedly tells her this, then realises it is only upsetting him each time because she doesn't remember and will ask again tomorrow. Ultimately he comes to the conclusion people with Dementia don't need to hear bad news, there is no point telling them anything, you end up in a cycle of repeating yourself until you could scream!

Reg writes honestly and openly describing the journey he takes with his mother and the rest of his family, the guilt, the exhaustion, the laughter and the love that ultimately shines through.
He hopes that this book may provide help to families coping with a relative suffering from dementia, and provides a Glossary at the end with helpful tips about Powers of Attorney, being patient, sparing them bad news and investing in a Whiteboard on which he wrote "Mum, you are home and safe. I love you. My phone number is " for those moments when they need reassurance and you can't be there.

by Linda Tilling

This book took me some time to get to, but when I finally read it, I found it to be a fascinating/thought-provoking read. It made me cry, and warmed my heart as I read Reg's diary of caring for his mother as she deteriorates from dementia.

by Morgan Tallman (via NetGalley)

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