Published: 15/05/2018
ISBN: 9781788034494
Format: Paperback

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About the Author

Ian Marsh has been working with business families and family businesses and for more than 40 years, first as adviser and litigator, later as trustee and confidant, and then as mediator. Today, Ian ... read more

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If it is so Good to Talk, Why is it so Hard?
Rediscovering the Power of Communication
by Ian A. Marsh

‘Talk to them.’ ‘Have the conversation.’ ‘You have to tell them’. We have probably all been there, whether it was the advice of someone close to us, or our own inner voice. It is always good advice, but some conversations are hard. We just cannot get the words out. Or we try our best but someone gets angry, or defensive, and it all goes horribly wrong. Maybe we think we got our point across, but it turns out that no-one was listening. Or, perhaps, that was us?

We are capable of the most amazingly subtle, nuanced communication. When we connect, we feel heard, understood. It feels good. Too often, though, the mental shutters come down. We may each say our piece, but that is it. No connection. No dialogue. Just a series of monologues.

What would life be like if feeling understood – by your family, by your colleagues, by your friends, even by those you strongly disagree with – was a regular experience?

Bringing together the latest neuroscientific research, ancient wisdom and his own experience of helping families through their hardest conversations, Ian Marsh explores why those shutters come down so easily and, through a series of guided reflections, shows what we can do to keep the social circuits in our brain turned on and tuned in to those around us; to rediscover the power of conversation.

When we do that, we feel better; we make better decisions; we have more influence on those around us; and we deal much more constructively with the inevitable conflicts in our lives. It is good to talk.

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